One very interesting thing that always makes me stop and wonder when I look into his georgous brown eyes and watch the smile widen across his angelic face is that if the amnio his Mother had when he was in utero indicated that he had an extra chromosome on his 21st pair, she would have terminated [so she announced after the test results were back and she revealed that that was not the case, but that she was carrying a perfect, healthy little boy, but if he had Down syndrome, they would have terminated]
As destiny would have it, Arthur made it into our world....wanted and loved. Cerebral Palsy is his disability......something that no prenatal test could determine, or allow his life to be considered not wanted. Arthur is here and we love him so very much!
As the years moved forward, his Mother did share with me that she is completely humbled by her 'announcement' years before.....that she loves her son so dearly and that she would have loved him with extra chromosomes or not....she loves him and that as she watches Emma Sage, she can not believe that her thoughts at the time would have allowed her to make a choice to terminate if the tests revealed a different diagnosis.
So I share with you a very special Birthday Celebration..........
The Birthday Boy!!!
Emma Sage and Arthur
Guess who is eight?!?
Waiting for the clown to arrive.
Look at these fun beads.......Mardi Gras!
Picking out a stamp with my cousin Fiona.....what fun!
Arthur getting a dolfin face stamp.
Emma Sage loved the whole process of getting the stamps ready for face painting....
My Sweet Sunshine......oh how I love you sweet little girl.
Riding on Uncle Ed's shoulders
This clown was absolutely wonderful.....he actually put his make-up on in front of the children, so that they would not be afraid of him......Emma Sage just loved the whole show.
My beautiful Sister Patti Ann [Trixi] and her littlest guy, Gabriel.
Then end of our day.....what a beautiful sunset.
9 comments:
What a beautiful post, like all of your posts! Very captivating. I too, know a few women who have declared Triumphantly that their Amnio was "perfect" and that indeed their baby was fine, only to find other things after their baby was born. One lady I met at our therapists office was the exact same lady, except she had an abortion after the amnio concluded her baby might have "learning disabilities" what ever diagnosis that was. Only to give birth to her next child who endured a life altering stroke 3 weeks after birth and is now partially paralyzed. Another good friend of mine admitted she would definitely have had an abortion if she had found out her baby had an extra chromosome, while pregnant. These are women who don't know, just like I never knew. You can never explain to anyone else the profound feelings you feel for your child, especially the one with "an extra one", it is a love deeper than any words will ever do justice to. Thank you so much for sharing the beautiful photos as well, it looked like a beautiful day!
Things like CP and autism may eventually be picked up prenatally and I am afraid those babies will meet the same fate as so many children with Down syndrome. People who are looking for perfect will soon find that it doesn't exist...you have to create your own perfect. And perfect to us is Jackson. Arthur is a handome little guy!
Beautiful post Tara Marie.
Arthur is a handsome young man indeed. Their story makes me think of a quote I like by Salman Rushdie, "Our lives teach us who we are."
What a beautiful post and a very happy birthday to Arthur!
gwhAnother amazing post, my friend!
How naive of us to believe that we can predict the future of our children by a simple chromosomal count done prenatally.
No matter how much science twists and turns, it will never be able to find "perfect", as that just does not exist in our humanness.
Or rather, perfection very much exists, and we just don't bother to celebrate it...
I have a very dear friend who's son is a bit older than Paige who has CP - he is very limited in his physical abilities, but he is full of amazing life lessons.
Happy, Happy Birthday Arthur!!!
What wonderful photoes! It looks like Arthur had a great birthday and everyone enjoyed the party. A moving post - my first reaction was 'How cruel life can be!' but just like anything in nature there is a beauty revealed in some of those 'harsh' lessons - Arthur is clearly a wonderful addition to the family and to society in general. Emma looks as beautiful as ever.
Have you ever read the "The Power of the Powerless"..it was written by a man about his brother with brain injury. I was moved beyond words.
You expressed the message of the book in your post.
The look on Arthur's face displays the message.
Hugs,
Amy
I appreciated reading this post. My oldest sister has CP (and is a disabilities activist) and I sent her a link because I know that she will love reading your thoughts. We have often talked about what might happen if CP or autism was testable prenatally. Raising my son Joe, with DS, is different than having a sibiling with CP, but many of my concerns about our culture of perfection have been shaped by these two people. Thanks.
-Amy
emmajoseph.blogspot.com
I came to your blog from Chewy Mom. I absolutely LOVE your photographs. You have a real talent for showing how your subjects "feel". Emma Sage is a doll. I will be adding you to my (too long:) list of blogs I read.
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