Nothing is Lost
Deep in our sub-conscious, we are told
Lie all our memories, lie all the notes
Of all the music we have ever heard
And all the phrases those we loved have spoken,
Sorrows and losses time has since consoled,
Family jokes, out-moded anecdotes
Each sentimental souvenir and token
Everything seen, experienced, each word
Addressed to us in infancy, before
Before we could even know or understand
The implications of our wonderland.
There they all are, the legendary lies
The birthday treats, the sights, the sounds, the tears
Forgotten debris of forgotten years
Waiting to be recalled, waiting to rise
Before our world dissolves before our eyes
Waiting for some small, intimate reminder,
A word, a tune, a known familiar scent
An echo from the past when, innocent
We looked upon the present with delight
And doubted not the future would be kinder
And never knew the loneliness of night.
Tomorrow it will be two weeks since my Mother died. It is still so very surreal to me.....like a dream that I will awake from. I have had to stop myself from reaching for the phone to call her.....crying as I realize that I can't just pick up the phone to hear her beautiful voice...her words that always made my world so bright.
We had a family gathering on Saturday at my grandparents old farmstead, which is now a park. We had the most wonderful time. The children played, in the delightful and innocent way that children play. We shared stories of Mom and I made four of her recipes that my Mamie had always loved.....trying my best to keep my Mom's generous heart and spirit near.
Here are some images from our day......
Emma Sage and her cousin Ronan peeking through brick fence.
Princess Fiona, this little girl is such a treasure.
Welcome.....a word I love.
Mamie and Me.....I'm the oldest of 12 grandchildren and there are now 19 great-grandchildren and one great-great-grandchild.
Otto and Mamie.....Otto looks so much like my PopPop, whom I loved so dearly. The bench they are sitting on is a bench in the little alcove that is named for my grandfather.
Kelsy and Gabriel.....Kelsy is such a wonderful big sister.
This is as many of the great-grandchild we could gather at one time, without some of the little ones toddling off. There is one stow-away in the picture....Otto's best friend Michael come with us to the family reunion.
Kesly, Greta and Gabriel. Greta was so blessed to be at Gabriel's birth, as she wants to get her RN and Midwifery degree after highschool.
The whole gang heading off to hunt for sharks teeth.......little Miss was way behind with Mommy and yelled for help....guess how stopped to wait for her. Her beloved Uncle Mikey [my little brother, whom I love so dearly]
I have more pictures to share, but alas....time is running short and I must head to bed as I have been so very tired lately.
9 comments:
(((HUGS))) Tara Marie
I wish I had words to console your heart right now. I too still try to call my mom in fact I said to myself last Monday, gosh it's almost 4 and I haven't talked to mom today. I went to pick up the phone, dialed and realized at some point she wasn't going to answer. Allow yourself to take it one day at a time. Just remember you mother is never absent from you she's smiling down on you everyday. (((HUGS)))
Shawn
Thank you for sharing your lovely photos. What a beautiful family! I hope the heartache your are feeling for your mother will be a little less each day. She will always be with you & your family.
You have a big, wonderful family that will live on to recall so many memories. Take comfort in them.
I have to add that at first glance I thought that Greta was you! Your kids are so grown up.
Blessings to you darling Tara Marie.....
It is two months October 12th for me since my beloved Mom entered her eternal life.
I loved your verse.
Keep the strong positive thoughts flowing and know you are never alone.
You are so lucky to have family and young children around.
They keep the happiness in your heart.
Love Jeanne ^j^
Beautiful pics TM! I know your mom was with you in spirit....
I wish I could help heal your heart and that there was a way to fill that void in your life and heart, but, there isn't. Mom's are very very special, and you just can't replace them. I'm so glad your family is so close, in proximity and in spirit, I'm sure that is helpful. Know that we are thinking of you!
Hugs!
beautiful family pictures; I'm sorry the pain of losing your mom is still so fresh and raw. I wish I could say something to make it all easier on you. Your mom's spirit will live on through you, your siblings, the grandchildren, by keeping her memory alive.
Oh Tara, what wonderful family photos. You have such a skill at capturing just the right moment.
Hello Tara,
Lauren and I really appreciated the pictures you posted of the reunion memorial in Holmdel this past weekend. We were really sorry we couldn't come. Maybe next year. Oh, I was wondering, how many sharks teeth did Otto and Andy find? I heard they were back there forever!
Sam
Hi Tara, The pictures are gorgous. They made me cry. Especially the ones of your grandmother. And yes, Otto looks so much like your Grandfather. What a blessing and comfort. I see alot of you in Gretta. Pattys kids are beautiful too. Emma is precious. Im am so sad about your Mother. It breaks my heart. She loved you all so much. Jennifer
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