Wednesday, November 16, 2005

One Womans Choice

One Woman's Choice

After a Prenatal Test Shows Down Syndrome, A Wrenching Decision
By Maria Eftimiades
Special to The Washington Post
Tuesday, November 15, 2005; Page HE01


What makes me so sad about this article? The fact that for many people the diagnosis of Down syndrome automatically equates to a death sentence.

This is not about abortion for me ~ I firmly believe in a woman's right over her own body and her right to choices.

For me, this article smacks of Eugenics, pure and simple.

Ms. Eftimiades should grieve for her precious son. She should grieve over the fact that she allowed fear, prejudice and discrimination to steer her actions.

I'm the same age as Ms. Eftimiades [well almost, I'll be 42 next month] and as a Woman and a Mother, I feel deeply for her loss. She has no clue to the incredible magic that T21 would have brought to her life. She wanted so much to be a mother, and for that loss I ache for her, because being a Mother is truly the essence of who I am now as a human being. But Ms. Eftimiades should really re-think her desire to be a Mother, it seems to me by her reasoning and actions with this child she is not ready to be a Mother and she doesn't fully understand what it MEANS to be a Mother.

Mothering is unconditional love, unconditional care, unconditional nurturing.........It is embracing your child, your whole child and going forth in life with this child and doing the best you can, unconditionally.

Ms. Eftimiades should grieve, grieve for her little boy who would have looked more like his parents, than not. A little boy who would have loved them unconditionally, irregardless of their fears and biases. Their son would most likely verbalize to them that he disagreed with their thought process of making the *right choice for the three of them*............he would most likely say "Mom, you made this choice for the two of you,,,,,,because you see Mom, I would have embraced my life with all my heart and soul and I would have filled your lives with so much love, laughter, joy, excitement and enlightenment."

This article hurts me, Ms. Eftimiades...........It hurts me as a MOTHER, because you have publicly proclaimed to the world that MY daughter and every other human being with Down syndrome has no worth,,,,,is disposable...

You should grieve, Ms. Eftimiades,,,,,,,,because you are wrong, so very wrong.


Update: I found this wonderful letter on NRO regarding this article.


Mauzy said...

too sad, and its even worse that the Post thought this article was worth the readership....erg.

From a mom that knows too. hugs

Belovedlife said...

It makes me sick that the medical profession is so busy finding ways to detect instead of help. DS is PERCEIVED as negative, when reality is positive. Education is the key, educating the doctors and the parents with ACCURATE information. We have a doctor that we know who has completely changed the way that they deliver the diagnosis since they have gotten to know Peanut. I am very upset about article like this one....bad media coverage and lack of are not alone.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you. The kind of thinking from the article is sad and in fact dangerous.
I would however, extend your line of reasoning to all children who are in danger of being "disposed" of, not just those with trisonomy 21. They are all precious whether the mother thinks so or not.

Tara Marie said...

Mauzy and two are both incredible mothers and I am thankful to call you friends.

Anonymous, I agree 100% all children are precious....every single one, and while I believe in freedom of choice, I do not agree with termination for any reason, because I believe all children are sacred and gifts from GOD.

My focus is on T21 because this article plainly targeted Down syndrome and the 'new and improved' tests are specifically targeting Down syndrome/T21 earlier and earlier with the sole intent [I believe] to encourage mothers-to-be to terminate within that 12 week window so to have the terminations fall within the 'right to choose' catagory as opposed to the EUGENICS catagory that they clearly fall into with the 22+ week abortions.

Life is a blessing and it is sad that many people do not realize the gift of life.

CrazyPatGirl said...

I could not agree with you more Tara Marie. This woman wanted this baby, it's not like she was not ready for this baby, unmarried, etc. She simply discarded this baby for the single reason that he had Down Syndrome. G-d forbid she ever has a baby and something happens after birth. Like the baby has a rough delivery, and doesn't get enough oxygen, and has Cerebral Palsy, or menegitis, or a car accident. A mother loves her child no matter what. She is NOT a mother.