Monday, August 13, 2007

Never Say Beverly Beckham

Yes, another amazing read. I urge all of you to click on the above link and read this very perceptive article.

One thing that crept to the front of my mind when I read this article was an incident that happened to me this year at Emma Sage's dance class.

About halfway through the year of dance class, one Mother who always chatted with me and others, whilst running after her 18 month old.....stopped one day with tears in her eyes.

The Mother always stared at Emma Sage, and smiled and asked me lots of questions about her and Down syndrome.

On this one day, the window that looked into the dance studio, had been open for the first time since the children had learned the recital routine and they were executing it wonderfully [enough to bring a tear to every Mother's eyes that were there watching their little dancers]

She turns to me and says "Did I ever tell you I lost a little girl with Down syndrome?"

Me [with tears already to flow from the scene through the window] began to tell her how terribly sad I was to hear that.

I begin to venture forward with a question of my own [since I have dear friends who had tragically lost their little ones with Down syndrome to complications from heart surgery and/or other medical issues] I ask her "How old was she?"

"24 weeks" the Mother replies

I feel my skin get cold and raise in little bumps and a huge lump formed in my I now know 'why' her little one died.

"Oh, I'm so sorry" I reply.

She continues........."They lied to me. They told me that my daughter would never walk, never talk, never sing, never dance.......They told me she would be a burden and would ruin my life"

and here I sit, week after week, and I watch Emma Sage. I watch her walk, talk, sing, laugh, play with friends and dance.....and all I can think of is that "They lied to me"

[Now, I have tears flowing freely down my cheeks...there is no stopping them]

I get up and give her a hug and tell her how so very sorry I am for her and her little girl.

and then I tell her.....but now you know, they lie.....and you didn't know that at the time.....but you do now.


Kei said...

Oh, TM... I am sitting here with tears in my eyes.

Nicole said...

I remember you sharing this story with me before. I cried then and I cry now. I can not imagine. HUGS

Kim Ayres said...

That is heartbreaking

ostertaga said...

Oh Tara..that is heartbreaking..I'm so glad she had you and your compassionate soul to share that deep sorrow with. I'm glad that Emma's life displayed the truth so beautifully!


Trixie said...

And now I sit with tears flowing down my face. It's so sad.

Betsy said...


I just finished reading a series of papers on "wrongful birth" suits - its amazing how parents of healthy children with T21 who are just 4 or 5 years old have been awarded millions of dollars based on the theory that they were not given proper information and opportunity to terminate their pregnancies.

The tables should be turned, and many, many, many parents should be suing for "wrongful termination" because they have been lied to like this mom was...

Michelle said...

mMy heart totally breaks for her...