I try so hard to live my life absent of fear and worry....and truly try take one day at a time.
But there is one thing that I fear, and it is the same for all of my children, but paramount for Emma Sage. I fear that they never get sick......not your normal childhood colds, bugs and flu's.....but really sick, life-threatening sick.
And it has been a blessing that all Emma Sage has battled is the typical childhood illnesses......so when her blood work comes back 'funky' in November and with a set re-take in six months, your mind starts to wander and worry.
In March she was ill with Strep.....it seemed to hit the house, with Rick even getting it. She took her course of antibiotics and responded well. Or so it seemed.
About a month ago, she started getting bruises......big, bad bruises on her legs. I called my sister Patti to get her thoughts [as she is an RN] and we figured since the weather is nice and they had been all out on the play equipment and the bruises were in the spots that little ones typcially bang and bump in the coarse of play [her children too all seemed to be getting more bruises.....I did'nt really panic. Then they subsided and I thought...."Well that is good,,,,and how silly of me to worry". Around the same time she started to have a personality change....she was weepy and would cry at the drop of a hat [not typical Emma Sage behavior] and she started to act up [again, very unlike Emma Sage].....so much so that her behavior was wearing her Momma out, as I had to be diligent like a hawk to make sure she was not getting into trouble. She also started just taking 'breaks'....where she would sit down, put her thumb in her mouth and rest....and if you asked her 'What was wrong' she would tell me she was 'tired' or 'sick'.
These actions started to get my 'worried with fear' thoughts pumping.
She then started getting night sweats and running a low grade fever.
Again....nothing that you could pin-point a problem.....or a reason to call the doctors.
Then she woke up with this [and Momma really started to freak]
So off to the doctors we go......
Emma Sage's doctor feels that it is strep, that was hanging out somewhere in her body this whole time [resisting the treatment in March] and slowly running havoc with her.........
We will run a full blood test at the end of this round of treatment to check out her white blood cells that were misbehaving in November....just to make sure there is nothing else going on.
So.....this past week really unsettled me......I am so thankful that she already seems to be responding to this round of treatment, and pray that this is all that is going on with my little girl.
Then I can work real hard to pushing that silly Momma Fear out of the way and go back to living life to it's fullest, each and every day!