Saturday, March 25, 2006

A time of sweet sadness....

I write this knowing that while I always hold high expectations of my daughter [of all my children] and believe that anything is possible if they want it and work for it, there are somethings that even if we dream them, want them, work hard for them........they may never come true.

So here is a moment of sweet sadness....

This morning Emma Sage and I were getting up to start our day. We headed for the bathroom and because she had on footy-pajama's she had to unsnap them and take them off from the shoulders to the waist to go potty. As she undressed herself, Emma Sage pointed to her nipples and said 'I have little boobies' and I responded, "Yes, you do"

Then she says: "I nurse when I bigger......[and then pointing to herself] I nurse my baby".....

at which I just smiled and said "Yes, you can nurse your baby" and little Miss got the biggest smile and then pointed to me and said "You nurse all your babies" to which I smiled and said "Yes, I nursed all my babies and you were my last baby to nurse"

Then she reaches over to me and gives me a big, huge hug and says "I love you".

I hugged her back.....thinking of how precious this little girl is, how blessed I have been to nurse all four of my babies and then the thought that made this moment such 'sweet sadness'.....

I don't know if Emma Sage will ever be able to have that baby she so wants to nurse. But I realized that all I could do is 'sigh' and capture this moment for exactly what it was and know that 'Anything is possible' and leave it at that!

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Nothing is impossible "in his world!"
Linda D :)

Michelle said...

Oh Tara Marie I wish I could give you a big hug! Yes that is sweet sadness and I for sure have those moments too! But think what a gift you've given Emma Sage - to show her how wonderful nursing is that she wants to nurse her babies too :) I'm sorry this was one of those bittersweet moments though.

If you would like a little "pick me up" I've posted a link to a story on my blog. A very uplifting story about a couple with Down syndrome starting out on their married life. It's a great article with a slide show so turn your volume up!

Anonymous said...

I have thought about this too, although I haven't heard it from my little one yet-I am sure one day I will.

~*Radonna*~ said...

There is a whole world of possibilities out there for your little girl. While she may never nurse (but who is to say she wont)There will be many many chances for her to feel loved and valued and to give that love to others.
Thank you for sharing your beautiful little girl. She is a real sweetheart!

Anonymous said...

Oh how my heart ached and related with this post.. I often wonder the "what if", I think all moms like us do. The one thing that I constantly remind myself of in those moments is the blessings that my child will be able to share in, she shares things that children without handicaps cannot - and that makes her sooo very special.

Your daughter is a beautiful gift, I wish you grace and peace during those "what if" moments.

-Heather

Kari said...

I'm sending you a huge hug my friend. I have had a few moments like this and I totally understand. Thanks for sharing your sweet girl.